What You Always Wanted
Reached the bottom of The Cave.
25 ✓ July 5th, 2025
Embrace Impermanence
Got the bridge inside the temple to collapse.
10 ✓ July 5th, 2025
Creamed Corn
Saw every Can of Corn in The Cave destroyed.
10 ✓ July 5th, 2025
A Midsummer Knight's Thieve
Helped the Knight obtain Excalibur.
10 ✓ January 8th, 2017
Funnier Than a Burning Carnival
Enabled the Hillbilly to burn down the Carnival.
10 ✓ January 1st, 1753
Learn to Stop Worrying
Shared in the blame for the Scientist's act of mass murder.
10 ✓ July 5th, 2025
Grand Theft Karma
Played some dubious role in the Monk's murder of his Master.
10 ✓ July 5th, 2025
Shoplifting
Saw a postcard stolen from the Gift Shop.
5 ✓ August 18th, 2020
Who Wants to Live Forever
Got everyone out of The Cave without dying once.
40 
Win-win-win-win-win-win-win
Took all characters to the bottom of The Cave. (Player 1 only)
40 
The Whole Story
Unlocked all Cave Paintings. (Player 1 only)
40 
🔐 Redemption
Saw the good in everyone.
25 
🔐 Corruption
Saw the darkness in all our hearts.
25 
Don't Fill Up On Fortune Cookies
Got a Xavetar fortune for every character. (Player 1 only)
15 
Well Done
Witnessed a hot dog cooked with the monster's breath.
10 
Royal Buffet
Spied a King, eaten by a Dragon.
10 
Weight of the Beast
Got the Weight Guess scale to read 666.
10 
Fire In The Hole
All three characters killed by one Miner's dynamite.
10 
Walk Like An Adventurer
Pantomimed an ancient hieroglyph.
10 
Such Bad Children
Watched Mummy and Daddy's furniture get broken all to bits.
10 
Smells Like Team Spirit
Made all three characters smell like a dinosaur at once.
10 
To Soothe A Savage Beast
Recorded and played back the elevator music from the Zoo food court.
10 
Hazardous Work Environment
Saw someone slip off a ledge in the Missile Silo.
10 
🔐 It Belongs In a Museum
Came ever-so-close to recovering the Sarcophagus.
10 
🔐 God Bless Us, Every One
Murdered your parents.
10 
🔐 Prevenge
Murdered the ancestor of your enemy.
10 
Remorse
Saw a postcard returned to the Gift Shop.
5