Give It The Fingers
Successfully enter both your quips in a round
Quip It Good
Win both battles in a round
Quipee-ki-yay!
Win all battles in Rounds 1 and 2
Eighters Gonna Eight
Play an 8-player game
Hi, Jinx!
Enter the same thing as your opponent
The Titular Achievement
Get a Quiplash! (sweep votes in a 5+-player game)
He Who Lashes Last…
Get 70% or more of the votes in The Last Lash
Sitting Ovation
Play a game with an Audience
Quip Pro Quo
Write a quip that Schmitty actually responds to
Meatloaf Candy
Write "meatloaf candy" and win a battle with it