🏆 Lived The American Dream
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🥇 Razzed My Berries
(Chapter 8) Out-dance Rex George
🥇 Edward Scissorguns
(Chapter 20) Complete the stage without a single civilian casualty
🥇 The Ring of Freedom
(Chapter 22) Witness the dawn of the Second American Revolution
🥇 Continue the Cycle
Experienced the fake ending
🥇 End the Cycle
Experienced the true ending
🥇 Star Spangled Banner
Shoot all 48 hidden stars
🥈 Oh Maggot!
(Chapter 10) Eat at least 4 maggots from the cheese
🥈 How Is Babby Formed
(Chapter 11) Learn how babies are made
🥈 Freedom of Speech
(Chapter 13) Listen to all of Rex's objection before shooting him
🥈 True Patriot
(Chapter 16) Ensure all daisies survive til the end of the stage
🥈 Muzzle Break
Reach the Intermission
🥈 Happiness Is a Warm Gun
Shoot 1000 bullets
🥈 Half a Patriot
Shoot half the hidden stars
🥉 Begin The Cycle
(Chapter 1) Begin your journey into The American Dream
🥉 Baby's Got a Gun
(Chapter 3) Shoot the down the ducks with 100% accuracy
🥉 Rising Star Award
(Chapter 4) Catch the fast ball with your face
🥉 Heartbreak
(Chapter 5) Change your mind about which one of the twins you like
🥉 Carnival Pleasures
(Chapter 6) Shoot down 5 pins from the back row in the shooting game
🥉 Royale With Cheese
(Chapter 7) Earn at least $5.00
🥉 Float Like a Butterfly, Sting Like a Bullet
(Chapter 9) Defeat the hose without getting hit by any bolts
🥉 Cleansing The Mind
(Chapter 12) Hit yourself in the head with toilet paper
🥉 Vegan-Friendly Bagels
(Chapter 14) Complete the stage without letting a single rat dough through
🥉 Environmentally Conscious
(Chapter 15) Shoot 15 beer cans into the trash can
🥉 August 24th
(Chapter 17) Eat the entire stack of waffles
🥉 370,000 Traces A Year
(Chapter 18) Keep checking records even after given the option to Give Up
🥉 Catch of the Century
(Chapter 19) Shoot a fish in mid-air
🥉 Peacemaker
(Chapter 21) Blow up 20 cars
🥉 The Business of Freedom
Buy 50 Guns
🥉 Super Size Me
Eat 30 pieces of food
🥉 Bring All The Boys to The Yard
Make a milkshake
🥉 Jerkin Around
Pump the shotgun 10 times without shooting
🥉 Lock and Load
Manually eject and reload your gun 100 times
🥉 Twinkle Twinkle
Shoot 1 hidden star