🏆 MOUTHOLE Platinum
Good job! Completed all tasks!
🥇 Why Did I Watch Oh Why
You saw the News, and it wasn't good.
🥇 Floating Point
Following your ear, you went deep into the eye and ignored the aching in your mouth.
🥇 Worries Et Al
Your friend couldn't save you, and you couldn't save your friend.
🥇 Slow Worries; A Toll
You followed your dreams, and they followed you.
🥇 No Worries Atoll
You followed your dreams, to the detriment of those around you.
🥇 Broken Axles
You stalled out in the corridor and felt your pipes turn to rust in your gums.
🥈 Some Weeks Last Forever
You ignored the itching in your gums.
🥈 Your Life Was A Highway
You shouldn't have opened that letter.
🥈 Your Stomach Exploded
Cold beer soothed your ulcers, but you couldn't stomach it.
🥈 Butterverse Theorist's Field Journal
You experimented with the world around you, and were rewarded.
🥈 FASHIONHOLE
You've slipped so far down your own FASHIONHOLE that there may be no saving you.
🥈 BOUNCEHOLE
Nothing comes between you and something.
🥈 DING DING DING! BIG WIN! You're A Portfoliographer Now!
Your winnings will surely bring lasting happiness.
🥈 Purveyor of Plaque
Keep your mouth closed in polite company.
🥈 Fruitless Flosser
Smile wide and the world will shrug its indifference back at you.
🥈 Mister Moneybags Over Here
Hope nobody else was planning on buying anything anytime soon.
🥈 Vermicidious
...
🥈 Retinomania
You opened all of your eyes wide and revelled in their cacophonous din.
🥈 Foot Ball Man Ager
You feel a decade older after that ordeal, but a goal's a goal.
🥈 Dystychiphilioid
Enjoy yourself however you see fit. It's your life... I guess...
🥈 Glauch Potato
In the race to stop seeing, you're actually quite quick.
🥈 DRUM HOLO
Go on, let it all out.
🥉 Broken Legs
You lay in the corridor and felt your teeth turn to dust in your gums.
🥉 You Slept On The Floor
You went to sleep on the floor.